Leaving him behind…

… is something I’m struggling to deal with right now.

Our happy days were becoming too rare. The arguments increased. The stress made me sick. The constant running around made me resentful and tired.

So should I be feeling better? More positive? For leaving these emotions behind me?

What I feel is emptiness, loss, sadness, heartache.

My heart is aching for someone that never fought to keep me. That never answered my pleas. That never listened to what I had to say. Heard me, yes. Listened, no.

Why am I grieving something I knew would have to end at some point? Marriage was clearly not going to happen. Shouldn’t I be looking forward to a better future? A future I truly want?

Someone please enlighten me on why I’m feeling so down?

3 thoughts on “Leaving him behind…

Add yours

  1. Hello, we don’t know each other, but I just want to say I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s not easy, but you know these feelings are just an aspect of the mourning process, you’ve already mentioned how you made the right decision, you made yourself a priority when the other person didn’t.So! the hardest part is over, so you need to cut yourself some slack. Personally I think heart break should be treated more like an illness, you need plenty of rest, to eat nice healthy things, to understand that it takes time to heal,you will have up days and down days but I promise you this feeling is temporary, it will pass. Pick up a book, get lost in another’s world until you feel ready to step into yours again.

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